The Mass Incarceration of Children:

Philip Mosier is one of the over 2,600 currently incarcerated in the state of Florida for crimes he committed as a child.

Here is Philip's story:

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I was arrested on August 19, 2003, for armed robbery and sexual battery. I just turned 16 years old a few months back in April. I was raised in a very dysfunctional family. My father got custody of me when him and my mother divorced. This occurred when I was 3 years old. I had a brother that was three years older than me and a sister that was three years younger than me. My father ended up marrying our neighbor who had a daughter the same age as me and a son five years older than me. This woman ended up adopting me and my siblings and being my stepmother.

Sounds sweet? Trust me, it wasn't.

She turned out to be a crack whore that would go missing for days on end chasing crack. She'd do anything to get her next fix. For years my father tried to be the good husband and get her clean, but that ended in failure. I'm not sure, but when I was between 6 and 8 years old, my father started using narcotics. His drug of choice was prescription pain pills.

That's when my life really turned into hell.

Discipline went from parental spankings to slaps across the face and other physical assaults. I remember one time when he beat me across the house with the metal end of a belt. Thankfully my aunt interfered that day before he did something he couldn't have taken back. A couple years later, my brother who I shared a room with started sexually abusing me at night.

I believe I was around ten years old when I did my first drug. Seeing my parents pop pills the way they did make me want to try it. I snuck into their pill bottle and stole two pills I later learned was Lortabs. It was miserable, but my parents were doing it, so I wanted too also. My older brothers introduced me to cigarettes, alcohol, and an array of other drugs.

By the time I was arrested on these charges, I'd done just about every kind of drug short of using a needle. I was first arrested when I was 12 or 13 years old for possession of narcotics. I was caught with marijuana on my first day of sixth grade. Go figure. I had 13 prior arrest when I was sentenced for these charges. These included a couple possessions, a couple batteries, burglary, arson, grand theft auto, and others.

I was officially a screw up. Who cared?

Well, I'll tell you who cared. By luck, I met this amazing girl in 2002. I didn't know what it felt like to have somebody truly care for you as a person. When she looked at me, she did it because she was sincerely interested in what I had to say. She didn't just tolerate me. She was the first person I've ever met that made me believe I was a decent person and made me want to change. She showed me I could be so much more than what I was at the time. I was able to stop all the drugs but the most basic stuff like marijuana and pills.

In early 2003, we discovered that we were pregnant. I've never been as happy as I was at that moment. I knew what a perfect life was. Or so I thought. Her mom forced us apart, wouldn't let us talk, and in March of 2003, made her get an abortion. My life was shattered. I locked myself in my room for days crying and slowly spiraled into the worse drug induced life one could ever imagine. Her mother eventually communicated with me and agreed to let us start talking again as long as I paid half the cost of the $600.00 abortion.

Where in the world was a drug addicted 16-year-old going to come across $300.00?

Well, I guess you know, the underlying reason for my crime. One morning, my codefendant was needing some money for alcohol, and I was needing $300.00 so I could start talking with my girlfriend again, so we devised a plan to rob this dry cleaner located at the very end of a strip mall. We had it all figured out, but things didn't go as planned. He went in with a knife and I obtained a steak knife from the store. My duty was to hold the clerk in a back room while he scourged the store looking for a safe. While I had her in the bathroom, she was begging for her life and telling me how she just had a baby girl. To this day I don't know what overcame me, but I looked at her and said, "If you ever want to see your daughter again, take your clothes off." She complied and I sexually assaulted her. Guilt quickly got the best of me because it was less than 30 seconds into the act of intercourse that I just stopped and told her to give me her ID and the money.

I accepted a plea deal for a 40-year cap believing I was going to get a youthful offender sentence. I guess you know that didn't turn out as planned. At 17 years old, I was sentenced to thirty years in prison for each of my crimes followed by ten years of probation. I couldn't even comprehend that.

Hell, I hadn't even been alive but for 17 years, how could I imagine spending the next thirty years of my life in prison? 

Prison went as one would imagine in a nightmare. I was still on the bullshit and causing trouble. I had to act tough in order to hide the fact that I was being raped for protection. A fact that to this day I am so ashamed to admit. Because despite the fact that I said I would never let it happen again when I finally got myself out of danger, it did happen again. The first six or seven years of my prison sentence was terror in its purest form. Some of it was me being young and dumb, but most of it was me being young and vulnerable. I was taken advantage of and manipulated more times than I'd like to think of.

I was broken and doing anything to survive. Then the most pivotal day of my life came.

It was February of 2011, I was at Calhoun Correctional Institution, and I was sitting in my cell playing pinochle with a few of the guys. The officer came in to announce mail call and called my name. This amazed me because I didn't get mail. My family didn't write me. I went downstairs and was handed a small envelope addressed to me from a woman named Jessica in Virginia. I had absolutely no clue who this was. I opened the envelope and read the first sentence,

"Hello Philip, I know you don't know me, but my name is Jessica and I thought you'd like to know that you have a daughter."

She proceeded to tell me that she was my victim's cousin and that I had a daughter as a result of my crime. She told me that my daughter was extremely sick and wanted to know if I wanted to be a part of the girl's life. Many things went through my head at once. The foremost being that it wasn't possible because I didn't even complete the act. (A fact that I later learned meant nothing.) The next being that it wasn't possible because she was my victim's daughter. And finally, the last being that why should I even give a shit because I'm doing thirty years in prison. I tossed the letter on my bunk and start playing cards again. That night I laid in bed and thought just how miserable my victim's life must be. Not only did I sexually assault the woman, but I left her with a daughter that had to be a constant reminder to her everyday of what I did to her.

Guilt ate me alive that night like I never could have imagined.

The following morning, I made the best choice I ever made in my life. I decided to accept Jessica's offer to be a part of my daughter's life. I did it for three critical reasons. One, I did it because she deserved to have a father in her life. Two, I did it because it was time for me to grow up and be a responsible man. And three, purely for selfish reasons, I did it as a means of self-redemption, a way that I could feel better about myself.

Her name is Cordelia, or Cordi for short. I had no clue what to do or how to be a father. I had no loving father in my life as an example. The first step I took was to vow to never be like my father, and with that came my adventure of fatherhood. Letters were exchanged back and forth and her first birthday with me in her life was on April 20, 2011. Calls were very expensive back then and took acts of Congress to get approved. (Like phone bills and photo ID's) However, I was determined to make it happen.

I had a guy in the dorm with me call his mom on her cell, who called Cordi on the house phone, and then put both the calls on speaker phone close together so I could wish her a happy birthday. Hearing her voice for the first time was such an amazing feeling, but nothing prepared me for the wave of emotions that washed over me at the end of the call when my little girl said in the sweetest voice, "I love you, daddy."

At that moment in time, I decide to be more than her dad, I decided to be her daddy.

Any biological male can be a dad, but it takes a man to be a daddy. And to be her daddy, I had to do right by her. My next move in life was adjusting my mentality to being a daddy. Every questionable action, deed, or word I was to do or say always began with the crucial question, "Would my daughter approve?" I got this answer by determining whether I would do or say whatever it was in front of her. If I determined I wouldn't say or do it in front of her, I didn't do it.

It's a principle that still guides me to this day and rarely leads me wrong. I haven't had a disciplinary report in prison since 2012. Our relationship bloomed into something beautiful. Being a father is the most sacred duty a man could ever face, but also the most fulfilling. Although I was in prison, I strived do be her daddy. I sent her gifts and money for all holidays and birthdays, I helped with back to school shopping, and most importantly, I helped teach her right and wrong. Talking with her on the phone was one of the brightest moments in this place. She was the second person that made me want to do and be better.

I started taking different religious and self-betterment courses in prison. I got IT certified, used my own funds to enroll at California Coast University for an associate degree in criminal justice, and obtained a paying job in 2016 that I have kept to this day. A job that only about 5% of the inmate population can claim. I've taken college courses on a Pell Grant for business, and I've taken several advanced computer and business courses through the company I work for. All of this just because a little girl said, "I love you, daddy."

Our road hasn't always been bright.

In 2014, Florida passed a new juvenile law that the courts determined only applied to juveniles with life sentences and de facto life sentences. In a miracle opinion, I was able to convince the Second District Court of Appeal in 2016, to apply this law to my thirty-year sentence. In 2018, I was taken back to court to be resentenced. It was at this resentencing that our troubles started. 

Jessica had custody of Cordi the entire time that we were communicating. Her mother had no clue we were in contact with each other over the last several years. My attorney couldn't pass up the opportunity to show the courts how much I had matured and how good of a father I was. Cordi was 14 years old at the time and both her and Jessica wanted to do their part in helping me come home early. So, Jessica testified, and Cordi submitted a heartfelt letter on my behalf. Her mother lost her mind, and the press ate me alive. Although the court reduced my sentence to 28 years in prison with a 20-year juvenile review hearing. My victim petitioned the courts for custody back and in February of 2019, was given such.

At that moment, me and Cordi were no longer allowed to communicate.

I almost allowed it to consume me, I almost allowed it to send me back to my old life, but I stopped and asked, "Would Cordi approve?" And of course, the answer was no. I continued to better myself and move forward with the belief that I showered my baby girl with enough love that on the day she turns 18, we'd be ready to pick up where we left off.

This fact proved true. I had a message sent to her on April 20, 2022, the day she turned 18. Like me, she was counting the days for that time to finally come and was more thrilled than me to be back in contact. Our relationship is even better than before and she blessed me with a beautiful granddaughter, Lydia Rose, on March 9, 2023. Happily, ever after!

Well, there's my story. It's a little lengthy, but I think it's called for.

Philip Mosier   DC#S15748

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